Monday, March 11, 2013

monday blues.

mondays are hard for me. all of 'em. i love spending the weekend with my boys and it's hard to get back into the groove of things. i'm thankful for a job i like, or else mondays would be wayyyy harder than they already are. but i find myself feeling sad at work on monday mornings, missing my little man and wishing i could spend all my days with him. it's hard to have to send a text just to find out how his morning is going- are his teeth bothering him? did he take a good nap? did he do something cute or funny? did he learn to crawl today? i told daycare not to tell me if he crawls there first. i'd rather have the blissful ignorance of thinking that i witnessed it myself.

i feel strangely jealous of our daycare providers. i'm thankful that we have a fantastic daycare and people there who i know take good care of him, love him, and know him. but it's just not a substitute for being with him myself. not to mention we pay an arm and a leg for him to go there.

but i know he's gaining things from daycare that i couldn't (or probably wouldn't consistently take the time to) give him at home in the same way. he's learning to socialize friends his age.
playing in the tent at daycare with his two buddies, spencer and ashton
he's learning to be independent. he's learning to be comfortable with other people besides just mama. he's doing art projects, singing songs, and learning sign language.
someone learned how to feed himself his pouches of baby food
our goal as a family is for me to eventually be able to stay home. i'm well aware that being a stay-at-home mom will not be all sunshine and rainbows. i know i'll have hard days. i know i'll be lonely some days. i know i'll crave adult interaction and a break from my busy boy. but despite the tough days i know there will be great ones too. and lasting memories. and time spent with bennett (and, hopefully, other little ones) that is precious and goes too fast.

though the ultimate goal is for me to be a stay-at-home mama, we have other goals as a family that require both of our incomes. like paying the bills (ha). but really, we hope to be able to move into a new house in the next year or so. that's going to take some major saving for a down payment. and for now that means me working. and at the end of the day, i'm ok with where we are and excited for where we are going.

even on mondays.

this will be my first 4-day work week. looking forward to fridays with my babe from now on :) one step closer...

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